Sounds a bit like an oxymoron!
However bear with me for a moment because when you view something from
a different perspective. The insight will come through.
I have experienced depression; the dark night of the soul, when nothing but
nothing seems to work, all the old ways of behaving and places that bought
some joy and relief were no longer available.
A feeling of the world disintegrating before my eyes, where nothing I grabbed
hold of remained mine. The physical world felt and looked like shattered glass.
The usual mirrors of laughter and fun, were behind
Another wall out of reach, I felt like they were no longer available to me.
Gone were the days of meeting up with old friends, chatting, sharing jokes and good shopping.
I could no longer do things and make things "happen" like I had in the past.
It wasn't that getting out of bed was difficult, but knowing what to do next.
I choose deliberately not to take medication. I did not want to dull the "pain"
I did not want to experience any more avoidance
So I sat and waited and felt, and didn't try to be something I wasn't.
No pretense of happy joyful fun. I think this is what people call navel gazing.
I did not try to cover up what was happening with the insidious energy of positive thinking
Then I discovered how frightened I was of literally everything!
That came as a bit of a shock!
Because I had been fairly gung ho in my past life
So what was stopping me now?
It seemed I had to completely let go of my story; that being everything I thought I was
All the roles and identifications
As this began to happen without judgment or analysis,
I became lighter in my being. I started to see clearer.
My experiences began to open to the non physical dimensions
I kept my mind open and choose life
It wasn't that the thought of suicide didn't enter my mind
But I choose to tell my soul I wanted to know its very being and to live
within the realms of its guidance and understanding.
Because clearly what I'd been doing had not really worked out!
I learned to breathe!
The simple breathe of life, deep into my soul.
The love of which responded with a communication unmistakable to my mind
The simple breathe
I dare you to walk away from suicide, to breathe!
Deep deep breathing, this comes to you with such love.
Breathing will take you out of the numbness
It is all right to feel!
One breath at a time!
This was my way out of the super conflict I found myself in
Depression is not caused by body chemistry.
The body responds to the depression and in an attempt to feel better changes
Depression is a box of paradoxes, and the point you choose to breathe into
will take you to the release of yet another layer of the tightly bound energetic
thought systems of expectation you can find yourself in
Start breathing and stop hyper ventilating
Surrender and breathe
Let something new happen!
Margo Knox
About Author :
Margo Knox is a coach in the field of awakening
The practical workbook "The 7 Doors, Keys to Your Full Potential" is available online at http://www.margoknox.com
